Never Land

 Title: A Rum Thing Indeed
Characters: Bertie, Jeeves, House
Rating: Gen
Words: 700
Disclaimer: Don't own them. Never will.
Summary: Bertie discovers American TV
Author note: Crossover ficlet written several years ago for zulu  and never posted anywhere. Just found it on my hard drive.

“I say, Jeeves,” I remarked. “This is a puzzler and no mistake.”

“Indeed, sir?” replied Jeeves, holding the shoe he was polishing up to the light and inspecting it carefully. There was something about the tone of the fellow’s voice that I didn’t like.  Perhaps it was the hangover I was nursing.  But it seemed to me that Jeeves had managed to fill the two syllables of the word “indeed” with something very like impertinence. And I was not in the mood for impertinence. I wouldn’t go so far as to say I was feeling disgruntled, but I was far--very far--from gruntled.

I replied with some asperity. “When I say, ‘This is a puzzler, Jeeves,’ I rather expect an offer of help. Not the implication that I am a fat-head to whom the smallest thing is a puzzle.”

Jeeves put the shoe back down on the hotel carpet and addressed me with a suitably respectful demeanor. “I regret that I gave offence sir. None was intended. May I be of any assistance?”

“I certainly hope so, Jeeves,” It was hard to stay angry with the man, and besides I needed his considerable brainpower—the man eats only fish—to help solve the current mystery. Without budging from my place on the sofa, I  pointed the remote control toward the large television ensconced in the hotel’s wooden console. “That fellow, who’s always solving mysteries—what’s his name?” I began. It was on the tip of my tongue.

“Sherlock Holmes, sir?”

“Good Lord, no. I’m referring to this chap, the medical man—there.” Jeeves turned his gaze toward the screen and squinted for a moment.

“I believe that is Dr. Gregory House,” he declared.( Read more... )

Sleeping Man III: Settling the Score

Characters: House and Wilson
Rating: Gen
Timeline: The fall, around the time of Cane and Able
Summary: A brief epilogue for Sleeping Man I: Outside and Sleeping Man II: Inside. This won’t make sense unless you’ve read the earlier parts first.

PS I re-wrote Part 1 of this sequel. Also, yeah, the LJ cut better work this time, or else….Or else I’m gonna have to give myself a severe tongue-lashing and possibly a timeout.

 ----

Part 1  

2. Conclusion

Wilson made his way from the men’s room at South Station to the café table where House was waiting. They had a good half hour till their train left.

Sleeping Man III: Settling the Score

Characters: House and Wilson
Rating: Gen
Timeline: The fall, around the time of Cane and Able
Summary: A brief epilogue for Sleeping Man I: Outside and Sleeping Man II: Inside. This won’t make sense unless you’ve read the earlier parts first.

1.
Since coming back from the dead, House had become something of a minor national celebrity, and when he alerted Police Department headquarters in Cambridge that he was arriving the next day, ostensibly for the simple purpose of retrieving the remains of his motorcycle, the Chief of Police himself insisted on meeting him.
 

Fic: Good For You
Characters: House and Foreman
Rating: Gen
Word Count: 3,150
Summary: Missing scene from Painless, Season Five, in which a reluctant Foreman helps House out
 

“Where are you going?”

 
“If Cuddy can come in late, I can go home early.” House slung his jacket over his shoulder and with an air of devil-may-care that was far too studied, slanted out the conference room door.

“Whoa,” said Thirteen, making a moue and looking around the room at her comrades. “What’s with him?”

Foreman slipped from his chair and stood in the doorway, watching House work his way down the hall.

“And what are you doing?” asked Taub.

It was all Foreman could do to keep from curling his lip in disdain. They had worked and lived with this man for how long now, and they still couldn’t read him, couldn’t pick up the most blatant signals. How could they call themselves diagnosticians? House made sure no one ever saw him grimace in pain, but it was hard to miss the serial Vicodin doses and the halting walk.( Read more... )